Category Archives: PAL

Dressing the bump

So when it comes to maternity clothes, what exactly do you need?

I’ve just hit the second trimester, and although I haven’t gained any weight yet (darn morning sickness) I do have quite the little bump.

Going into a maternity store is overwhelming and pricey. I prefer to shop at store that have a smaller selection as they usually have the basics. Kohls, Target and Wal-Mart are my go to. Prices are reasonable and often you can get coupons and hit sale racks.

I went to Kohls recently and picked up some starter items. Keep in mind, you don’t just have to shop the maternity section. Look at regular sale racks for items that are stretchy already. I found a very cute dress for a beach casual wedding I’m going to at Kohls for $10. It was non maternity, but was a super stretchy knit fabric that showed off my bump in a super cute way!

Also, don’t forget to check your local thrift stores! You don’t wear maternity clothes forever, so if you can pick up a pair of jeans for $6 bucks instead of $30, why not??

Now, everyone is different, but here are items that I see as basic, versatile starters.

Maternity/Nursing Bra.

I needed one of these bras as soon as 8 weeks. I was initially worried about not having an underwire one (they are ridiculously hard to find), but found that a wireless bra works just fine. I was skeptical as I was “well endowed” in the chest area to begin with and pregnancy has only added to that. I was afraid that I wouldn’t have the support I needed in a wire free bra, and that the ladies would look saggy without formed cups and wire to keep them in line. I was pleasantly surprised. I highly recommend this particular bra from Kohls as it is very comfortable, soft, and grows with you.

https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-2703366/Maternity-Playtex-Nursing-Seamless-Nursing-Bra-4956.jsp?pfm=bdrecs-WebStore-PDP-Horizontal1-b563-231&bdrecsId=001356eb-83c0-4073-8410-1e1bbe4b1568

Maternity Tank Top.

Not only are these great for a hot summer day, but are equally a great for layering. They also work nicely for extending the life of that favorite non maternity shirt that now isn’t as long as it used to be.  Do yourself a favor and get a couple in different colors, you won’t regret it!

https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-3331313/maternity-aglow-seamless-cami.jsp?color=Dapper%20Tan&prdPV=1

Black Leggings.

Maternity or non, find yourself a nice stretchy pair of these gals. Even if you weren’t a leggings person before pregnancy, these will be a life saver. Great to wear under dresses and skirts, by them selves, to sleep in etc…You will never run out of uses for these comfy pants alternatives!

Maternity Tee.

Pair with dress pants, skirts, jeans, shorts…you name it! Dress it up, dress it down, these type of shirts are worth buying (maybe in several colors!).

https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-3023694/maternity-aglow-scoopneck-ruched-tee.jsp?color=Dark%20Dusty%20Heather&prdPV=7

As for maternity pants, I unfortunately do not have any to recommend as I have yet to find any that fit me well. It seems that maternity pants for tall people are very hard to find. While I am tall at 5’9, I am not exceptionally tall and have been surprised that it is so hard to find long maternity pants. When I do find a pair, I will let you all know!

Now, depending on what season you are pregnant, or if you are a working mama, your style, etc… here are some additional items that might be worth looking at.

Maternity winter coat: https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-3329965/maternity-aglow-quilted-puffer-jacket.jsp?color=Mineral%20Black&prdPV=1

Jeans: https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-3333340/maternity-aglow-full-belly-panel-slim-bootcut-jeans.jsp?color=Dark%20Wash&prdPV=4

Swimsuit: https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-2853913/pink-envelope-maternity-polka-dot-swimdress.jsp?prdPV=2

Skirts/pants for work: https://www.kohls.com/product/prd-3429046/maternity-aglow-full-belly-panel-ponte-bootcut-pants.jsp?color=Olive&prdPV=5

 

 

One foot in front of the other

Folks, I took another step today.

About 2 months ago I created a baby registry. I put 2 things on it and never touched it again.

Today, I filled it out with basic baby items. I felt like I needed to do something to address the fact that I still feel like I’m in denial that I’m pregnant again. I need to make this real to myself.

I just hit 11 weeks and a small bump popped up! I thought for sure it was too early, but after some research I discovered you can have a bump as early as 10 weeks if it’s not your first pregnancy.

I finally bought some maternity bras. I’ve needed them for weeks now, but even after trying 4 different stores I couldn’t find and that I was comfortable in. I really didn’t want to buy any online, but I got sick of store hopping. They will be coming in the mail soon, so here’s hoping!

Morning sickness is settling for the most part, but I can’t tell if it’s gone because I’ve been able to sleep in. The real test will be when I get another job and have to get up early in the morning again. I think this little one prefers to sleep in!

Turkey and Mistletoe

Ah, the holidays. Every loss mom’s 2nd most hated time of year.

A time to be grateful, thankful, spend time with your family. Spread cheer and good wishes. Decorations and parties, gifts and family pictures.

Well I’ll be honest. I hate all of it.

Don’t tell me to be grateful and thankful when my kids were ripped out of my life. I don’t want to spend time with family because my family is never complete. Screw your cheer and good wishes, life handed me misery and pain. I don’t have my kids to help decorate, go to cookie baking parties, help me messily wrap gifts or wear adorable outfits for the family photo.

My little one isn’t covered in mashed potatoes, or passed out in a sugar coma under the Christmas tree. There’s no making of Christmas lists or spying for Santa on the neighbors roof. I’m watching the Thanksgiving day parade and The Grinch by myself.

So how on earth do we deal with it? We stand up for ourselves and include our dearly missed children however we can.

I tell my mother in law that I am not going to church on Christmas Eve because I couldn’t give two shits about God since he took my kids away.

I unfollow my friends with little kids on social media for a bit so I don’t have to see all the cute little outfits, pictures on Santa’s lap, or faces covered in cookie frosting.

I make sure if there are any family photos that my necklace with Nyla’s ashes in it is visible on the front of my shirt.

I buy my kids Christmas ornaments every year and hang them front and center on the tree.

The holidays are a terrible time. Do what you have to to get through them. ❤

MIA

As y’all have probably noticed, I have been MIA for a bit on here. There were two reasons that I kinda disappeared. Firstly, I had a major depressive funk.

I just couldn’t bring myself out of it. The weather change didn’t help, but it was almost like my antidepressants took a vacation. I was dragging myself to work barely on time, dragging myself home to then put on pjs and curl up under a blanket. I just felt emotionally blah. I was at the point where I just didn’t feel anything. It was like I was sitting back and watching a movie of my daily life. To be honest, I’m still not fully out of it, but I do hope the worst has passed.

Secondly, as soon as I started to feel better, I found out that I was pregnant! I know we were trying, but boy, did it throw me for a loop. I couldn’t focus for a week! Needless to say, I’m scared with a dash of excitement. Every day feels like a year and I wish I could just get to the end of it.

Morning sickness has already made its appearance (I was really hoping to skip that this time!), along with bloating, headaches, back aches , hot flashes and very disconcerting intermittent pink discharge (I know it’s fine, but it scares me every time).

Morning sickness is the worst right now. I’m living on zofran and quickly finding out this kiddo’s food aversions. So far pulled pork was warned against with nausea, and Swiss cheese cubes plus ranch veggie straws were decidedly unappreciated and promptly removed from my stomach.

I’ll do weekly updates as I progress, please wish me luck!

Still “Off”

I’m not gonna lie, I haven’t been doing well lately–feeling not quite myself. The worst part is I don’t know why. I’m pretty damn sure it’s because everything in my life is changing all at one (well not EVERYTHING, but you know how it feels).

The season changed, and I suffer from SAD on top of my depression and anxiety. I got a new job, and it’s another cycle of TTC, We are heading into October which is Riley’s birthday month (Halloween to be exact), and I’m taking a swim in my past which I still don’t know if it’s gonna come back to bite me. I severed some connections that were long over due recently, and I’m in a financial battle with my old apartment complex that is sending my anxiety to 90 mph.

So after writing all that, I guess if I was doing well I would be superhuman. But dammit, I want to be superhuman and be able to handle everything. I am not good at taking one thing at a time, this isn’t the first time in my life where I have numerous changes happening at once–that’s pretty much the norm for me (sigh).

Long story short I apologize for my absence and am really trying to get back into the swing of things with writing on an every other day basis. Apparently my mind just needs to figure some shit out first and it’s gonna take it’s sweet time.

 

A Blank Mind

I really haven’t been in the mood to write lately. I’m just kinda stressed I think. Not only is stupid aunt flo in town, the hubs is also working late shift all week so I don’t get to see him pretty much at all.

I start my new job tomorrow, so today is my last day at my current one. Some co-workers brought in bagels, and I got a little stuffed elephant from my work bestie to put on my new desk. ❤

I think my mind is taking a processing break. I usually always have something on my mind, and feel like my brain is going a mile a minute. But I just don’t have anything I want to write about. I know I usually post daily, so I figured I needed to post something so people know I’m still here.

Maybe after my first day at work tomorrow I’ll feel like writing.

 

*internal screaming*

Aaarrghh…guess who showed up today? Yepp–the red tide of disappointment. So much for that waiting game I was talking about.

In order to make myself feel better that it’s “negative on the preg-ative”, here’s a laugh.

 

download

Hmm..pretty sure we can dude. No uterus, no opinion.